I've just finished spending a week with my youth group at
camp. What an amazing experience! I think I was just as blessed if not more
than the kids.
God has been speaking to me a lot lately about not living in
the “waiting room” during this period of my life. While visiting Kentucky in June, a dear
friend of mine said something that so perfectly described my state of mind at
that point that I've thought about it ever since. She said that I probably felt
like my life was waiting to begin. So true! It was after that I felt God
speaking to me, reminding me that although Matt and I still don’t have a child
in our home, my life is anything but barren.
God has given me the most precious gift of being a youth
leader. I've always thought I might work with kids at one point or another,
maybe in a school setting, but I truly did not set out in life thinking this
was my calling. The job fell into my lap last fall. God also gave the perfect
group of kids for me. I actually call them little old ladies- most of them
value their sleep, do very well in school, and get irritated by loud music. I
do have a small number of boys in my group, but it is mostly comprised of
girls. They have been such a blessing to me, especially as we have gone through
this entire process. They are all so excited for me to be a mom.
While in worship one night at camp, I looked over the sea of
middle school boys and girls, and God reminded me of the verse John 4:35, “Look, I tell you, lift up your eyes, and see that the fields are white for the harvest." I was overwhelmed by the enormity of my
task. During the rest of the week, I witnessed such a deep hunger for God, not
only in my own youth’s hearts, but in so many others’ that God allowed me to
minister to.
There is another verse in John that speaks of the harvest again,
saying that the laborers are few. God has fixed my path in such a way that I
must pour what he has given me into these kids NOW. My current plan for when we
have our baby is to continue my work, but who knows how that plan could be up
ended. That means I have a lot of work to do in an unknown period of time.
I ask you dear
readers; please pray that God allows our story to unfold in his perfect timing.
Clearly, this isn't just about me! I still have moments of aching to have my
baby now, but then I am reminded of the weighty calling I've been given.
It will be four years
on August 10th since I lost my dad. There was a picture that someone
took of him in recent years looking out on our hill in Kentucky, holding a
gardening hoe. I pray I can do even a fraction of the work he did while here on
earth.
For the harvest,
Kristin
